Let’s clarify: Women can excel as mothers while achieving remarkable success in their careers. Working moms form the backbone of our families and the workforce. (And remember, all moms are working moms.) They juggle a multitude of tasks—packing lunches, attending parent-teacher conferences, shuttling kids around, and more. Many also hold jobs as accountants, doctors, entrepreneurs, and in countless other roles while balancing these responsibilities.

In recent years, challenges have intensified for moms in the workforce. During the pandemic, a higher percentage of mothers than fathers reported struggling to give their all at work, needing reduced hours, and declining significant opportunities—promotions included—due to the tough balancing act of work and parenting.

Women’s success is vital for their families’ financial stability. Historically, nearly all income growth for middle-class families since 1970 can be traced to rising wages for women. Yet, negative and outdated stereotypes about women in the workplace still linger. Mothers often feel pressured to sacrifice their careers for their children, leading to guilt when they prioritize their ambitions.

Our guest today helps shed that guilt and encourages embracing ambition. Lara Bazelon is a single mother of two, a lawyer, and a professor at the University of San Francisco School of Law. She authored Ambitious Like a Mother: Why Prioritizing Your Career Is Good for Your Kids.

Jean discovered Lara through an excerpt of her book featured in The Atlantic, titled, “The End of Mom Guilt.” She eagerly engaged Lara in a discussion about how the notion of the “ideal” stay-at-home mom is an unrealistic expectation for many women, burdening them with shame when they fall short. Lara revealed how that shame affected her marriage, her children, and even her parents, who both worked while she was growing up.

“My mom spent a lot of her life consumed by guilt,” Lara shares. “My dad, on the other hand—who was always very ambitious—traveled frequently for work and didn’t feel much guilt at all. Ultimately, I love both my parents equally and feel connected to them. This shows that my mom struggled unnecessarily with guilt.”

We also explore the fallacy of work-life balance, the importance of being open about career goals in relationships, and how demonstrating ambition can positively influence children. Research from Harvard Business School indicates that daughters of working mothers tend to earn more as adults than those whose moms stayed home, while their sons are more likely to participate in household tasks compared to sons of stay-at-home moms. Additionally, kids of working mothers report being just as content in adulthood as those of stay-at-home moms.

This doesn’t imply that working moms are inherently superior to stay-at-home moms, Lara emphasizes. The research simply shows that the guilt many moms feel for prioritizing their careers is unwarranted.

In our Mailbag segment, Scotty Reiss from A Girls Guide to Cars answers questions about selling a used car and eligibility for new electric vehicle incentives. (Scotty also offered insightful tips in Episode 284: An Insider’s Guide to Cars.) In our Thrive segment, we discuss where to recycle clothes for in-store discounts.