We chase wealth and power, yet happiness often remains out of reach. What do overachievers need to understand?
When did you last evaluate your net worth versus your self-worth? These concepts might be intertwined.
This episode features business coach Keren Eldad, who has guided executives globally on this relationship. Known as "Coach Keren," she has a rich background, including military service in Israel and a degree from the London School of Economics.
Tune in as Jean and Keren discuss the essence of being an overachiever. They explore why the pursuit of wealth and status frequently leads to unhappiness. Keren emphasizes, "We chase greatness but deprive ourselves of joy in the process," sharing ways to appreciate daily achievements.
Many struggle with a relentless negative inner dialogue, harshly criticizing themselves even amid significant accomplishments. Keren reassures us, "Tomorrow is a new opportunity. Shift your mindset to be kinder and more accepting of yourself." Embracing self-awareness and acceptance can illuminate paths to genuine change.
It's vital to distinguish self-acceptance from self-esteem. Keren asserts, "Self-esteem is fleeting; what we need is self-compassion — to acknowledge our imperfections and recognize our shared struggles."
They also touch on the upsides of perfectionism when it stems from inspiration rather than fear. Keren advises, "Channel your goals positively; let your inner voice say, 'I want to,' rather than 'I should.'"
The conversation extends to burnout and how to reframe financial goals as enjoyable challenges rather than burdens. Keren suggests celebrating small victories in financial progress. Many fail to fulfill New Year's resolutions due to overly ambitious expectations. She notes, "Instead of waiting for significant outcomes, find joy in the smaller changes that signify progress."
In the Mailbag segment, Jean and Kathryn address a listener considering an MBA and investment strategies for graduate school expenses. Jean also guides a listener weighing options between Roth and traditional 401(k) contributions, and they discuss the complexities of selling a family home to secure an estate. Lastly, Jean explores income share agreements (ISAs) as an innovative way to finance college education.
Transcript
Keren Eldad: (00:03)
To understand when perfectionism is beneficial, you need to differentiate between setting high standards and self-criticism. If your standards lead to stress or judgment, they will hinder your goals and create unhappiness.
Jean Chatzky: (00:31)
This podcast is supported by Fidelity Investments, aiming to help you understand your financial situation and reach your goals faster. Visit fidelity.com/demandmore.
Jean Chatzky: (00:56)
Hi everyone, I'm Jean Chatzky. When did you last reflect on your net worth? What about your self-worth? This week's guest, Keren Eldad, has years of experience helping executives understand the link between these concepts.
Keren Eldad: (02:47)
Thank you, Jean. It's a pleasure to be here.
Jean Chatzky: (02:50)
It's great having you. How did you start coaching?
Keren Eldad: (03:28)
It was a journey of self-discovery after a personal crisis led me to seek answers and ultimately embrace coaching. This business has flourished over the last three years.
Jean Chatzky: (04:10)
What insights prompted your shift?
Keren Eldad: (04:12)
Despite achieving societal milestones, I felt unfulfilled, prompting me to explore deeper questions.
Jean Chatzky: (04:41)
Many successful people experience anxiety. What's the root cause?
Keren Eldad: (05:02)
Surprisingly, overachievers often face heightened financial anxiety. The fear of failure and judgment can intensify as one climbs the corporate ladder.
Jean Chatzky: (08:12)
What differentiates overachievers from regular achievers?
Keren Eldad: (06:39)
Overachievers consistently set and exceed ambitious goals. However, the pursuit often stems from a desire for external validation in terms of wealth and status, which paradoxically leads to anxiety rather than satisfaction.
Jean Chatzky: (08:12)
What strategies help overachievers pause and reassess?
Keren Eldad: (08:38)
Creating space for reflection is crucial. Personal crises often trigger moments of insight that lead to transformative change.
Jean Chatzky: (09:26)
How can one initiate personal change?
Keren Eldad: (09:38)
Change requires time and self-reflection. Focus on what brings joy and fulfillment rather than merely chasing financial goals.
Jean Chatzky: (10:52)
What about the challenge of negative self-talk?
Keren Eldad: (10:52)
Perfectionism often accompanies overachievement, leading to detrimental self-criticism. Cultivating positive self-talk is essential.
Jean Chatzky: (11:15)
How can one change this internal dialogue?
Keren Eldad: (11:20)
Start treating yourself with kindness. Recognize that everyone has off days, and it's acceptable to prioritize your well-being.
Jean Chatzky: (11:52)
What about those struggling with low self-esteem?
Keren Eldad: (13:10)
Self-esteem can be misleading; strive for self-acceptance instead. It is more stable and fosters genuine compassion.
Jean Chatzky: (14:50)
How does this relate to financial well-being?
Keren Eldad: (15:51)
Higher self-worth enhances financial discipline and respect for money, creating a healthy cycle.
Jean Chatzky: (21:31)
What's the key takeaway from all this?
Keren Eldad: (21:47)
Be gentle with yourself; you're doing better than you realize.
Jean Chatzky: (21:57)
Thank you, Keren.
In the Thrive segment, we discuss income share agreements (ISAs) as an innovative financing method for education. With ISAs, investors back students' education, and repayments occur as a percentage of the student's future income. A bipartisan bill seeks to enhance ISA accessibility. While ISAs may not be superior to federal loans, they can serve as an alternative for private loans.
Thank you for joining us today. Our guests have shared valuable insights on the connection between self-worth and financial success. Subscribe to our show on your preferred platform and leave a review. We appreciate your feedback. Until next time!
